How to reclaim back your power after a divorce
Divorce it’s one of the hardest things that anyone can go through and these are my top tips to help you reclaim your power back.
Allow yourself to grieve
Divorce represents a loss, even if by the time you split the divorce was something you wanted. The truth is that nobody gets married thinking “I am sure we can get divorced one day!”
Give yourself time to reflect on your relationship, your learnings, on the love and experiences you shared. Give yourself time to heal, to send love to yourself and everyone affected by this breakup. Give yourself time, as long as you need.
Work through your feelings
One of the difficult things to let go of after a divorce or break-up is the feeling of guilt. You didn’t do anything wrong, and even if you did or you believe that you did, you can’t start healing from guilt until you actually forgive yourself. It may sound easy, but we tend to forgive others more quickly than we tend to forgive ourselves and going through divorce or separation makes it even harder to let go of that guilt.
Find someone you can talk to release any heavy emotional luggage from your previous relationship. Whether is a friend, a family member a therapist or a coach like myself, try to find someone you trust to talk about how you feel and how things are going through. Talking to someone you trust might help you understand where your emotions and limiting beliefs come from and help you reduce feelings of anger and resentfulness.
Rediscover who you used to be
Remember who you used to be before your marriage? The hobbies and activities you used to have and maybe you gave up because they didn’t fit in your relationship.
Maybe you always loved going to the theatre, but your husband hated it. What else did you use to love? The change that comes with divorce also comes with the possibility of trying a new lifestyle and doing something different. It could be as simple as trying a new hairstyle or to deciding to go back to study and change your career to something you always dreamt to do.
Loving yourself again it’s easier said than done! I know it’s hard not to believe there’s something wrong with you when you couldn’t make the relationship work. But the hardest thing, however, is when we break up with ourselves even before our relationship comes to an end. The women that I work with and support have all experienced being at a cross point in their life even before the separation unfolded in their relationship. They are beautiful professional women, mostly in their 40s who feel overwhelmed, suffering from burnout, tired of constantly juggling with their life and having no time for themselves.
I help my clients to break through and regain the confidence they lost during their relationship, believe in themselves again, find a new balance in their life and lose weight, feel sexier and feminine under their own skin and create a future vision of a new life they love.
